For Karen.

This is PG-13, mostly for language and... implications. Plot? What plot? Canon? What canon? Disclaimer? Heh.

Thanks to Kelly for beta.

If she'd ever needed proof, she had it. He hated her. He wanted her to suffer, to pay for every single fucking time she'd shot at him or nearly caught him or hung up on him.

If this was payback, it could go on for quite some time.

"Just... fucking... stop... it," she growled from behind clenched teeth, yanking at her wrists uselessly. She'd read that silk was the strongest natural fiber, and now she had proof of it; her wrists weren't going to move. She was trapped for God knows how long, completely at his mercy, and she couldn't see him. "And take this damn blindfold off, Jarod."

"I don't think so."

Cold liquid trailed over her stomach, dripping and... sparkly? It was fizzing on her skin, from between her breasts all the way down, crackling and alive.

"What the..."

His tongue dipped into one of the pools of sparkly liquid on her stomach, and the warmth of it on her skin, surrounded by icy carbonation, was almost too much for her to take.

"I find that I have developed quite a taste for champagne, Miss Parker."

Bastard.

Always diligent, his tongue returned, followed by his lips, and she sighed, fighting to stay still. "I hope," she muttered, "you didn't buy it at the drug store."

He laughed. "Drug stores don't carry champagne that costs $300 a bottle."

"I don't think it's fair that you're getting to drink all of it." She bit her lip, trying to stop the yelp that really, really wanted to come out as his mouth sucked the cool liquid from her navel. Holy shit. She'd done things that most people had only read about in books, but this...

His tongue trailed up, following the liquid, and she couldn't hold back the moan any more. He chuckled, lifting his mouth from her skin. "I'm sorry. Is there a problem?"

"Of course there's a problem. I'm tied up and fucking blindfolded and you're drinking good champagne off my stomach. What part of that do you not under..."

Champagne-- just a few drops-- dribbled into her mouth, and Parker coughed, then swallowed. Damn, it was great champagne, but she hardly got to taste it before Jarod's mouth covered hers. His own tongue was still crackling from champagne, and she giggled at the sensation even as she pushed towards the kiss. Jarod pulled away.

"You're laughing at me?" She could hear the mock annoyance in his voice. "Now, that's a problem."

"I'm not sure what the hell else you can do to me..." Even as Parker said the words, she realized they were a mistake. Oh, hell. Never dare a Pretender who has you tied up, because you'll lose.

Or win, depending on your perspective.