A's "Take your OTP to Target" challenge? This is my response.

***

He finally finds her in the cereal aisle, glaring at the nutrition information on the Cinnamon Toast Crunch box.

"It's made with whole grains," Jarod offers helpfully. "You don't have to be mad at it."

Parker shoves the box back on the shelf. "Where did you park? Memphis?"

He ignores her tone and hands her the shopping list. "Do you want to split it up?"

"I want to get the fuck out of here, Jarod," she hisses at him, and a woman with a pink-cheeked toddler in her cart gasps as she hurries by. "If splitting the list up will get me the hell out of Target even one minute faster, split it up."

Jarod tears the list in half-- precisely, no crooked edges for him-- and hands her one piece. "Back here in ten."

As she stalks off, he calls after her. "And what's wrong with Target?"

She pauses, grabs a bag of Bare Naked granola (the one with the blueberries, he notes), and turns to him, raising one eyebrow.

"At least at WalMart, they sell guns."

** **

Ten minutes later, they meet by the endstand and Parker dumps her armful of goods into Jarod's perfectly organized cart, slamming her piece of the list on top, then turning and tapping her foot as Jarod looks through her purchases.

"I didn't miss anything."

"I'm just checking." He holds up a shirt. "Blue?"

"They didn't have red."

One more minute, and Jarod nods. "I think we're good. Let's go."

Parker steps in front of him and takes control of the cart, cutting off a mother with three noisy children to get into the shortest line. Jarod eyes the back of Parker's head, decides against saying anything, and smiles apologetically at the woman. "She's in a rush," he whispers, and the woman looks annoyed for half a second then melts at Jarod's smile.

Parker doesn't turn around, but Jarod doesn't need to see her face to know what it looks like.

The lady in front of them is buying what seems to be ten thousand rolls of paper towels, and Jarod uses the time to re-assess the cart. "Damn," he says finally. "We need more duct tape."

"I got two rolls."

"But..."

"You're right. I'll get more." Parker slips out from behind the cart, and smiles widely and insincerely at the woman behind them. "My brother chews through the duct tape so quickly. If I don't get more, who knows what will happen? Be right back. I promise."

The click of her heels fades as Jarod stares at the cart as hard as he can, avoiding the wide eyes of the woman and her suddenly quiet children.

If only he could Pretend to be invisible...

***

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